Overload!

I often find myself in the middle of situations that extend way beyond my maturity level. I deal with things that no normal 18 year old ever has to go through. I don’t want special treatment and I don’t expect sympathy but rather a person who understands; one I can open up to completely about everything. It seems however, that most times when I find that person it’s hard to open the flood gates to what I’m feeling. I’m so reluctant to become vulnerable, even to a close friend that I tend to bottle up my emotions even when I want to so badly get them off my chest. Sometimes I feel so heavy-hearted, but I can’t explain ‘cuz I’m so guarded. But that’s a lonely road to travel and a heavy load to bear. 

Opening My Eyes!

A friend recently bought me a book called The Shack by William P. Young. This same friend has been aware for some time now of my struggles with dealing with the past and the curve balls life has thrown at me. She suggested I read the book and promised that it was full of insight and hope. My buddy was right. If you haven’t read this book I strongly recommend you do; I couldn’t put it down. 

I’ve been finding it very difficult to understand why some people encounter so much hardship in their lives while others seem to get off so easily. It just doesn’t seem fair. Yeah I know, “life’s not fair”, I can’t even count how many times I’ve heard that.

As a Christian, I have trouble grasping the concept of God’s unconditional love for his children. This world is so full of crime, evil, hate, hypocrisy, and dishonesty. Where is the love in that? People are so calloused. Would a loving God subject his precious children to this kind of horror? Most would say no and along with that claim atheistic or agnostic belief systems. But where does that get them? Emerged in a screwed up world with nowhere to turn; tricked into believing the lies the world is continually telling them. 

 So after some much needed prayer, reading The Shack and studying my Bible I’ve come to a conclusion…

Hope (verb) To believe, desire, or trust

Hope is a verb, verbs require action, action requires commitment, commitment requires a choice; therefore, hope is a choice. Each individual has to choose to believe, desire, and trust what God is doing in and through his or her life.

God didn’t put all this crap here in the world. It was us; sinful humans. God’s actions are always expressions of love. He brings life out of death, freedom out of brokenness, and turns darkness into light. Just because God didn’t interfere when troubles occurred doesn’t mean He can’t still use the situations for good. We need to stop trying to be so independent and just rely on God and His plan for our lives. “People are tenacious when it comes to the treasure of their imaginary independence…They find their identity and worth in their brokenness and guard it with every ounce of strength they have” (Young 189). All the evil in this world is the direct result of our hunger for independence.

Faith (noun) Confidence or trust in a person or thing

We all have faith. Every last one of us. The difference is, what or who we invest our individual faiths into. When we choose to put our faith in God we enter into a relationship with Christ. A relationship in which we can experience true love in its utmost. “Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld” 2 Chronicles 20:20

Do bad things happen? Yes. Are there always explanations for these hardships? No. Does God work purposely through these situations along with other similar experiences? Without a doubt! “Don’t forget that in the midst of all your pain and heartache, you are surrounded by beauty, the wonder of Creation, art, the sounds of laughter and love, of new life and transformation, of reconciliation and forgiveness” (Young 191).